Thursday, September 22, 2005

Not all white coats are dinner jackets, Mick

I'm rattled because I have a lot on my To Do list and so far, this has been a singularly unproductive day. Just now, after the 99th thing went wrong (don't ask), I logged on to the internet thinking I'd spend twenty minutes browsing blogs and searching for my lost perspective.

My perspective came whooshing back when I found evidence that some people are even more nuts than yours truly. Take Mick Silva, for example. Yes, I know he just started a new job and that's always stressful. But check out this excerpt from an argument he had on Monday morning with his own subconscious mind:

Oh, come on. Don't be a fool. You know that this impulse toward efficiency is just another example of your misguided measure of success in this new job. What is it you think he's working for?


So it's just himself, his own personal measuring stick?

No. Would you just be quiet? I'm trying to help him get organized. We need to be organized or we won't be productive. Productivity is the goal, not some vague concept of achievement. And whatever you're trying to do with this devil's advocate thing isn't helping. He's already decided that.

Ah. Point for you. Yes, well done. Because you know, it would be difficult to try to explain this warring identity to his colleagues.


Sure. You're right. You can't afford to let him get derailed again because it would be uncomfortable facing this obsessively-efficient, business-bound mind of his, especially given that idealistic, spiritually-centered persona he likes to put up.

Okay. You want to know something? If anyone's making him neurotic here, it's you. You can't even see how a little forethought into our week helps make time to engage in these cute little digressions? Writing, editing, family, friendships, church, blogging--it's all possible because of my help. Discipline is actually the essence of freedom. But then, I wouldn't expect a self-absorbed bleeding-heart like you to understand that. You can't really think I'm using his need for acceptance.

Of course not. I think you're using his need for congratulatory praise.

Mick, you are one sick puppy. Next to you, I am downright calm and reasonable. Thanks for the lift, my friend.

Now if everyone will excuse me, I'll get back to my busy Thursday.


Bonnie Calhoun said...

I think he's perfectly normal...ROFL :-) I own my own business and when there's a snow storm in the winter, I call and leave a message on my answering machine, saying, "I'm taking the day off and if you don't like it, fire me!" I used to play boss and worker....sitting in my chair yelling at the chair in front of my desk...and then switching positions and yelling at the boss....a customer caught me one day, so I don't do that any more :-)

MickSilva said...

Just boggles the mind, doesn't it? I'm thinking of seeking sponsorship from Starbucks. Or Zoloft.

You know, you really shouldn't encourage him. He's already becoming a reeking bore.